What does love look like after 40? It’s a question many couples find themselves asking as they navigate the complexities of career, parenting, aging, and rediscovering themselves.

Recently, I had the joy of joining Jese Gary on the Life Over 40 Podcast for a soulful conversation about what I call the “love evolution.” This episode, Raw Secrets to a Love Evolution After 40 (What No One Tells You), goes beyond surface-level relationship advice to uncover what it really takes to build connection, intimacy, and joy as we grow older.

🎙️ Listen here: Life Over 40 Podcast – Raw Secrets to a Love Evolution After 40

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The Raw Truths of Love After 40

In the episode, we talked about something many couples struggle with but rarely name: the difference between parenting your partner and partnering with your partner.

As I shared with Jese, “You don’t parent your partner — you parent yourself. As my partner, we are collaborating.”

That simple shift in mindset can change everything. Instead of “you need to do this or that,” couples begin to approach challenges as a team — which is where intimacy, trust, and long-term connection truly thrive.

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What We Explored in the Episode

• Why couples counseling can be a game-changer – even when nothing is “wrong.”
• The role of emotional intelligence in lasting love – learning to connect beyond words.
• How to embrace a relationship reset – at 25 years married or 2 years in.
• Daily practices to reignite intimacy – because passion and connection don’t have an expiration date.

Jese framed this beautifully at the top of the episode: “Not from the lens of starting over, but from the beautiful, sometimes messy work of staying connected and growing together as a couple.”

Whether you’re married, dating, or rediscovering yourself, this conversation is a reminder that love doesn’t fade after 40 — it evolves into something deeper, more intentional, and more soulful.

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Resources to Support Your Own Love Evolution

💡 My Therapy Cards – Relationship Edition
A reflective, therapist-designed deck to help you and your partner explore communication, intimacy, and connection in practical ways.

💡 Insight to Impact Training
Therapists and coaches: (In Texas) want to level up your work with couples? My one-day certification workshop equips you with Prepare/Enrich training, clinical skills, marketing strategies, and a year of mentorship.

💡 Couples Therapy Group: Loving with ADHD
ADHD adds layers of complexity to relationships — but it doesn’t have to mean disconnection. Join our upcoming group to strengthen communication and collaboration with evidence-based tools. Open to Couples in Texas or Florida. Check out this Free Couples Tool.

👉 Ready to take the next step in your own journey? Join my email list here and receive a free self-care workbook to get started.

🎧 Don’t miss this episode — it’s not just about relationships after 40, it’s about choosing growth and connection at every stage of life.

👉 Listen to the podcast now
👉 Explore my programs and resources at On Epiphany Lane.

When you’re living with PTSD, it can feel like safety is always just out of reach. After a traumatic experience—whether it’s a natural disaster, sexual assault, accident, or combat—your mind and body may continue to react as if the danger is still present. You might have trouble sleeping, experience vivid nightmares, or feel constantly on edge. Maybe things you once enjoyed feel dull or distant. You might even prefer to be alone because it feels more manageable.

These feelings are common in the aftermath of trauma. For many people, they ease over time. But for others, they persist and interfere with daily life—sometimes for years. When that happens, it may be Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

What PTSD Looks Like

PTSD symptoms typically fall into four key categories:

1. Re-experiencing the trauma through intrusive memories, flashbacks, or nightmares.
2. Avoidance of people, places, or situations that trigger reminders of the trauma.
3. Negative changes in thoughts and mood, such as persistent guilt, shame, or emotional numbness.
4. Hyperarousal, including irritability, insomnia, or constantly feeling on guard.

A diagnosis of PTSD requires symptoms in each of these categories. Only a licensed mental health professional can determine whether you meet the criteria—and that first step of talking to someone can feel both terrifying and empowering.

How PTSD Shows Up in Our Communities

At Epiphany Lane Counseling, we understand that PTSD doesn’t look the same for everyone—especially in Black, Brown, and marginalized communities where trauma may be layered with systemic injustice, generational stress, and cultural silence around mental health. PTSD can show up as chronic irritability, disconnection in relationships, panic attacks, or high-functioning anxiety that masks deep emotional pain. Women and femmes, in particular, may carry trauma related to sexual violence, caregiving burnout, or racialized misogyny, while youth and professionals with ADHD or anxiety may experience trauma as physical restlessness, emotional overwhelm, or a constant fear of failure. We hold space for all these expressions of pain—and guide you with compassion and evidence-based care toward healing that honors your whole story.

You Are Not Alone—And There Is Help

At Epiphany Lane Counseling, we specialize in trauma-informed care that centers your unique story, needs, and healing goals. We draw from evidence-based and integrative models to treat PTSD in both teens and adults:

• Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (TF-CBT) helps you reshape the connection between thoughts, emotions, and behaviors related to trauma.
• Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) equips you with tools for emotion regulation, distress tolerance, and interpersonal effectiveness.
• Narrative Therapy empowers you to re-author your story, placing the trauma in context rather than at the center of your identity.
• Our Integrative and Somatic Treatment options incorporate mindfulness, breathwork, grounding, and body-based techniques to help release trauma stored in the nervous system.

Our clinicians create a personalized, strengths-based plan to help you reclaim peace, power, and joy—the pillars of our care.

Support Tools and Resources

If you think you might have PTSD, you can explore these trusted self-assessment and educational tools:

• National Center for PTSD
• PTSD Coach App and PTSD Coach Online
• PTSD Treatment Decision Aid
• Understanding PTSD and PTSD Treatment Booklet (PDF)
• PTSD Whiteboard Videos

These tools are a helpful way to learn about symptoms and begin thinking about treatment options—but they are not a substitute for care.

Start the Healing Process

You deserve healing. Whether you’re newly experiencing symptoms or have lived with them for years, there is help—and hope. Let this be your moment of epiphany: healing is possible, and you don’t have to do it alone.

Join the Client List or Schedule a Free Consultation with our Crew today and take the first step toward feeling safe in your body and life again.

“1 in 5 adults in the U.S. experience mental illness each year, but most won’t get the help they need—especially in communities of color.”

What We Miss During Mental Health Awareness Month

Mental Health Awareness Month shines a spotlight on an issue that affects millions. Each year, about 25% of U.S. adults experience a diagnosable mental disorder, and 10% live with conditions like major depression or bipolar disorder.

But awareness alone isn’t enough. What happens after the spotlight fades? What actions do we take once the social media posts stop trending?

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🔹 What Awareness Months Do Well

Visibility matters.

Lately, I’ve noticed a growing cynicism online about awareness months. In a world where being “woke” is used as a slur, these campaigns can feel performative or overwhelming. But I still believe in their value—especially when it comes to mental health.

Awareness months create visibility. They connect people to information, offer language for experiences they haven’t been able to name, and give permission to be vulnerable. They also reveal the values of the companies we support.

Take Target, for example—once praised for embracing cultural awareness campaigns like Black History and Pride Month. After pulling back from DEI initiatives, their shift in values became clear, and consumers took notice.

At their best, awareness months help workplaces show support for employee wellness. For Mental Health Awareness Month, letting your team know that their well-being matters isn’t just a kind gesture—it’s a workplace culture shift.

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🔹 Where Awareness Falls Short

Mental health isn’t trendy. It’s daily.

Here’s the hard truth: mental health doesn’t fit neatly into a campaign. For those who live with severe mental illness, awareness content can sometimes feel dismissive—or worse, like a trendy aesthetic.

Hashtag fatigue is real. Awareness without action creates disillusionment. When people see content that feels generic or disconnected from real life—“just journal!”—they tune out. Others may even feel guilt or shame if they can’t relate to the suggested tips.

Mental health is not one-size-fits-all. People need deeper tools, personalized strategies, and consistent care—not just an inspirational quote in May.

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🔹 What We Can Do Differently

For Professionals:

Make it actionable.

As a mental health professional, I try to do something each May—not just create content. This year, I spoke with a group of Black men about reclaiming their mental and physical well-being. It was powerful.

Whether it’s promoting free mental health screenings, encouraging employees to use their benefits, or destigmatizing therapy—we can meet people where they are and offer real tools.

For Everyday People:

Make it routine.

If you’re not a therapist, you still have the power to build a system that supports your mental health. Think of Awareness Month as your personal reset button. Start simple.

Need a place to begin? Try these tools I love and recommend:

• Cope Notes – A digital support tool that sends thoughtful, therapeutic messages to your phone daily. Use code ONEPIPHANYLANE for 10% off your membership and try it free for 7 days.
• My Therapy Cards – Created by a Black woman psychologist, these decks offer guided prompts for women, men, teens, and now couples. I even use them with my clients when they feel stuck in session. They’re beautiful, insightful, and effective.

Mental health support isn’t a luxury—it’s a lifestyle.

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🔹 Legacy + Connection

My journey with mental health is deeply personal—it began long before I became a therapist.

Growing up, my family says I was always tuned into people’s emotions. I was sensitive, and even when I tried to act tough, my mom knew how to make space for that part of me. I loved creating stories with my Barbie dolls—what I thought was “playing Oprah” looked more like group therapy sessions on the porch. By middle school, I was a Peer Mentor, and by high school, I knew I wanted to help people navigate the emotional challenges of life.

My 20-year battle with Lupus has also taught me that raising awareness often comes from lived experience and pain. Even when I talk about it openly, it’s usually after something goes wrong that people start to pay attention. Losing my mother when she was only 66 has made me even more aware of how trauma and stress impact physical health. We can quite literally burn out if we don’t take care of ourselves. Awareness is important—but it’s not enough. It reminds me that advocacy doesn’t stop with an Instagram post. It has to move us to action.

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🔹 Let’s Make It Count

We can make Mental Health Awareness Month more than a moment. Here’s how:

✨ Drop a comment: What’s one mental health goal you’re working on this month?

✨ Try a tool:

• Get 10% off Cope Notes with code ONEPIPHANYLANE – click here.
• Grab a deck of My Therapy Cards to start your self-reflection journey.

✨ Ready to start therapy or coaching?
If you’re in Texas or North Carolina, join my client list at www.onepiphanylane.com.
If you’re outside those states, and you’re a professional with ADHD or a new leader managing anxiety, book a free coaching consultation to see if we’re a fit.

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Mental health is more than a hashtag.
Let’s turn awareness into action—together. -On Epiphany Lane

Spring Reset: Your Guide to a Fresh Start

Ah, Spring. The season of blooming flowers, longer days, and that urge to clean everything. While January often steals the show as the time for resolutions and fresh starts, Spring offers a unique opportunity for renewal and growth – both personally and professionally.

We all know how New Year’s resolutions tend to go: ambitious goals, initial enthusiasm, and a gradual decline into old habits. But with Spring comes a natural energy and motivation that can be harnessed for lasting change.

The Magic of Spring Resets

Spring cleaning isn’t just for your house – it’s for your mind and soul too. Here’s how to embrace the season of renewal and hit the reset button on your life:

1. Start with intention. Before the day gets away from you, take a moment to set an intention. What do you want to achieve or focus on today? It could be as simple as “I will be present” or “I will prioritize my well-being.” 

2. Reflect and adjust. Take time each evening to reflect on your day. What went well? What could be improved? This self-awareness is key for growth. 

3. Embrace imperfection. Remember that change is a process, and setbacks are inevitable. Be kind to yourself, learn from your mistakes, and keep moving forward. 

Goals: Small Steps, Big Results

Instead of overwhelming yourself with massive goals, break them down into smaller, actionable steps.

• Progress over perfection. Celebrate every victory, no matter how small.
• Find your support system. Surround yourself with people who encourage and inspire you.
• Be flexible. Life is unpredictable. Be prepared to adapt and adjust your plans as needed.

The Journey of Growth

Remember, lasting change is a journey, not a destination. It’s about showing up every day, making an effort, and enjoying the process.

So, are you ready to embrace the Spring reset and unlock your full potential?

Check out the Epiphany Lane Counseling Crew at our website to book a therapy session and get starting on your growth journey.

Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below!